butterfly

thinkin.. and it hit me.. been talking to God about prayer in this period.. asking Him how to pray effectively.. cos dunno why had been jus feeling rather vague about prayer.. perhaps cos been praying less than i used to for a long while.. anyway, hit me that pastor has been talking abt prayer for the past 2 weeks in service.. so, feeling glad that the God i talk to at home when im alone is the same God that speaks to pastor.. yah. may sound abstract.. but i find it comforting and touched, and thankful to my Father when i realised it.. sort of like He reminding me that He is with me..

one of the things pastor mentioned was the first line of the Lord's prayer.. "our Father.. hallowed be Your Name.." to pray first by acknowledging God (our relationship with Him) and giving praise to God.. yah.. so i tried it today.. and tho it sounded strange at first.. as i praised God and reflected on His wonder, on the Person that He is (eg. 'praise You Father, for Your faithfulness, for Your creation, for Your majesty..").. i felt better and more aligned with Him even before i had started praying for any agenda that i had.. its like.. you see what a wonderful Father you have.. and the things that trouble you will take on its correct perspective and become smaller.. reverence, awe come in.. and i remembered Jesus and thankfulness came in too..

reminded me of years ago when i had done the same.. yah, used to pray like dat too yrs ago.. hmm.. amazing.. no wonder God ask us to start praying like that.

sigh.. need more discipline mann.. awareness of the battle within.. indeed, the good i know to do i struggle to do.. i know if i look to the Spirit, He will give me strength.. need to decide to look more often..

its been a long week.. activities.. prayer meet, dental talk, cell, out w frens.. yah.. glad to take it slower? friday.. felt a bit down.. mayb tired.. watching too much tv.. a couple of frens had stress yest *sayang*.. was a bit frus w ano fren today.. yah.. not really sure wat to do, do more, do less, keep praying?..

got a drink jus now.. ice cube fell and poked my foot and there was a small cut.. can u believe it.. i was like.. oh mann.. blood came out and so went to room then remembered i may feel faint during first 10 mins of seein my own blood (when i injure myself).. oh mann again.. then hypothesised maybe feel down cos 5 pm and i'm hungry..

yah.. now at home typing and thinking.. glad to be home to rest too.. LY sent me a cd..