tried doing pilates supposed to be a 30 min things.
1st time : lasted 7 mins.
2nd time : 23 mins

:p  hopefully can keep it up..
on ano note. here is a pretty song..

"Living alone here in this place
I think of you, and I’m not afraid
Your favorite records make me feel better
Cause you sing along
With every song
I know you didn’t mean to give them to me

Cause you went away,
How dare you?
I miss you
They say I’ll be OK
But I’m not going to ever get over you"

its nice to hv frens. esp the ones in Him.

signing signing bank loan things today. good that things are moving along. Hope its all done by the time the next installment is needed.. found out i can get my stamp fee refunded thru CPF! good to have more liquidity. oh boy.. i can potentially foresee a lot of planning and things ahead.. but not much to be done now i guess except make some general notes here and there.. next yr is still a question mark. kinda stressful. but still carrying on. and experiencing His grace.

not many meetings this month. in fact i think we have not met for a mth. Things sure are different in different places. or is it also cos of our age grp. not sure how new pple r assimilated.. still observing how things work in this new place.

Trust Me.

another reminder i am too old to stay up past midnight. woke up this morning feels like ive ran a marathon. (ive never ran a marathon.)

or maybe it means i need some regular exercise.. haiz.

in love with Him..

everyday try to find some time to be.. in love with Him.

like when i look at IAJ and we twinkle at each other.

Catch His eye and *twinkle*.

i guess just as marriage takes time and effort to nurture.. so do we and Him..

As a father has compassion on his children,
    so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;
¹⁴ for he knows how we are formed,
    he remembers that we are dust.
¹⁵ The life of mortals is like grass,
    they flourish like a flower of the field;
¹⁶ the wind blows over it and it is gone,
    and its place remembers it no more.
Psalm 103 : 13-16

I read this verse today and it reminds me that we are but dust. and we should not make too much of ourselves or think too highly of ourselves.  With the pressures of the big city, it is easy to get caught up in the culture of pursuits to have big house, big car, look good in front of others etc. This is all vanity.  Dust in the wind.

I hope more of my life can be invested in things that matter to the Lord..

The Lord works righteousness
    and justice for all the oppressed.
Psalm 103:6

I've been reading a friend's blog recently. And I find what she wrote v encouraging. The Lord has used her wonderfully and given her great compassion. O her blog is here http://blog.kitesong.sg/

She has great focus. As i contemplate my present life, i find i am not so focused. Distractions, hp, fb, tv, internet. everything with a screen has become a source of distraction and a drain in time and energy because of the way i use it. With focus, a magnifying glass can start a fire. I am inspired to regain my focus in Him.

Been back for about a year. Coming close to settling in a church? Hope so.. I guess i am trying hard to settle down. That's what i do, in my usual detached fashion. We bought a home, which is still being built. I think we gave finding a church, finding jobs, a good shot. Im glad Isc has found a passion/hobby/possible career choice in flying. Not many pple find something they thoroughly enjoy. I hope he can pursue it.

After swimming in a wide expanse, can a fish go back to living in a fish bowl? Sometimes i feel like that. I dont know what to focus on. Maybe i dont want to see/not ready yet? What if there is nothing to see? surely that is not possible right? a lot of dont know. Actually i sense there are things to do. Maybe I am not ready yet.

They are right. There is such a thing as re-entry. It takes time to move on. Even from good things. There has been so much change in the past few years for us. I wanted to believe that i was returning to something that has stayed the same. But everything has changed. Thank God for the precious few things that have remained or even gotten better. It has had its rough patches. But i am aware we are still v blessed and His hand is still upon us. I thank Him for the new things. In the past years, there has been much pain, loss, heartache. Also much thankfulness. n lessons. For a while mayb I just didnt want to feel anything. Is this part of re-entry? The country has changed so much too.. that doesnt help..

I'm not sure what it will take to be/stay focused. Sometimes i take the easy way out and numb myself with distractions. Sometimes i wonder if i shld just give up trying to settle down and devise plans to go elsewhere. But i wonder if that would be just me trying to distract/entertain myself with other things. If the motivation is not right, i dare not go. Remember Moses dared not go to the Promised Land without Him. Re-entry is kinda like jetlag, you feel out of sorts n out of sync.. 

We get so used to doing things out there. Doing, doing. Actually we are firstly His children. Children dont need to do anything to be His children and to enjoy Him, and for Him to enjoy us. Sometimes doing things may even be our false sense of security. But it is for naught. I find it difficult to not do things. to just be. I have changed too.

I miss the students. I wonder how they are doing. and because there is nothing much I can do, when I remember them, I commit them to Him.

Starfish. Sometimes there are so many needs in the world. Its hard to remember we are starfish.