hand pain after CPR.. but glad that it is done.. sigh.. painnn..

Romans 12

¹ Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. ² Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Deut 8

¹⁰ When you have eaten and are satisfied, praise the LORD your God for the good land he has given you. ¹¹ Be careful that you do not forget the LORD your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws and his decrees that I am giving you this day. ¹² Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, ¹³ and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, ¹⁴ then your heart will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. ¹⁵ He led you through the vast and dreadful wilderness, that thirsty and waterless land, with its venomous snakes and scorpions. He brought you water out of hard rock. ¹⁶ He gave you manna to eat in the wilderness, something your ancestors had never known, to humble and test you so that in the end it might go well with you. ¹⁷ You may say to yourself, “My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me.” ¹⁸ But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your ancestors, as it is today.

dear bro, listening to Jay Chou makes me think of u.. Wanping got married u know.. was a lovely wedding... they look v happy tog. the brothers costumes would have gotten a reaction out of u.. :) would u have hidden in the suite to watch tv till the dinner began too? not that Wanping would have allowed u to. hah. Election is coming.. wonder who u would be supported..

been journaling last few days before coming here. not sure why but it helps me. maybe helps me to quiet down and reflect. PTL even changed the way i interact with Dragon now.. he is a good kid..

back for hardly 2 days and now i have cough..... the weather changes are hard for me to adjust... sigh.

gng TCC later.. Easter today.. never seemed to celebrate it much before.. went on an Easter egg hunt before i came back.. on the pretext of helping a little boy :) but it was so fun to be able to assist him and see his face light up when we spotted an egg and when he opened the plastic ones to find candy inside. Esp cos his mom died a few years ago so it was nice to see him smile..

mayb its silly.. but i miss you brother.. maybe its cos there was news today of another brother who suddenly left due to an accident.. another good young brother gone to Him so soon..

been having so many meetings.. work is starting in earnest again.

listening to Jay Chou.. reminds me of the times we went Karaoke with Wanping.. She's getting married soon you know..

HM plays the guitar q ok.. she played for us the other day. I tried practicing plucking the other day.. I remember how your face used to light up when you held the guitar or played music whether it was on the keyboard or drums. I guess it was something you were genuinely passionate about. And for a moment you would not be thinking of how to suan me. ha. :)

sometimes i wish we could have had more time tog.. but i know His way is best.. i wonder what you would say to that.. but the last few months you seemed to struggle so much.. wanting to fight the illness.. being disappointed each time the test result was not optimistic.. and having to find more strength to continue the fight..

I hope your last few days were good ones.

tomorrow got full day activities!

been back a week.. i like sg.. hope can come back here..

Tomo gng out with Wanping! i really appreciate having friends.. certainly one of His more precious blessings.

more or less settled in, but still get tired easily..

got to throw away some clutter in the room! want to throw more out!!! therapeutic? :)

i like clean and spacious room.. no clutter..

still need 20 CDE points.. hope to get them in April maybe.. dont seem to have any suitable ones for the time being..

i'm not exactly sure why, but all the noises are very irritating..

how weird it is when people complain frequently how poor they are and then go out and spend hundreds on themselves. I hope I wont be like that ever..

some people are more trying to get along with than others.

going back to Kunming in 2 days, then after 4 days head to sg! Can't wait to see my friends and family!!

But before that, need to :(just to remind myself)
1) do performance evaluation with Yumei
2) see if I can promote her to take over my job
3) get picture stuff from Mbeth

yesterday snowed. could not leave house. but tried sledding and shoveling snow..

just confirmed my sg ticket for CNY. phew.. for a moment wondered if i had booked from bogus website..

kaobeikaobu sounds again from chufang.. oh well.

interesting culture.

here is one of the many random condom machines along the roads of Kunming!! Its as common as dustbins in sg!

sign near our rehab dept in Kunming (area look a bit messy, like geylang) Basically the sign says " you will be easily robbed here, please leave quickly!". I thot it is so funny, like the police have given up. hee

i thought of KL today again.. I miss you brother.. wish you were here.. i know you are better off there.. i just wish you were still here..

In USA now.. taking a break after months of running around.. i'm not sure i like this kind of schedule of super busy and then super free.. maybe i do better with just an average level of busyness and then some peaks and eases?.. but it is what it is.. still, PTL for everything..

These few days been thinking of KL, dunno why.. maybe cos been playing the drums in Band Hero game.. makes me think of him. wonder if i would have done anything differently if i had known he would leave when he did.. thank Him that we did get to spend time together when i last went.. at least i got to pick him up from the airport and buy him a newspaper.. i think he did know that i cared(?).. i miss you brother.. would be great to see you again one day.. you are one of the most special family i have met here. I'm glad for the good times and good moments we have had.

Look forward to visiting TCC.. i guess it has been so long since i have attended an english speaking place.. the possibilities are exciting and something to look forward to.. for now anyway.. we havent had a regular place for a long time.. would be nice to settle down somewhere..

the team should be in kunming by now.. wonder how they are doing.. hope the staff had a fabulous time and learned a lot.. :)

time passes slow and fast at the same time.

wa so exhausted and dont know why. came home and veged out on couch and just feel drained.

on thinking i saw 12 patients today when i usually see max of 8. sigh. so stressed. on one hand wan to help them so they can complete treatment but on other hand feel so stressed about time that i feel like a mean dentist. sigh :(

so how.. dont complete treatment and make staff work overtime but feel like i was kind dentist at the end of day? i dont have anything agst the patient, i actually care for them so i wan to finish treatment so they dont need to come back but when they keep doing things that distract or delay it gets on my nerves cos i am stressed that i cant finish for them.. so i snap a bit like ' stop doing that' etc.. sighhhhhhhhh

i think need to balance. being nice might not take as much time? but they really cooperate a lot better after i talk seriously to them.. and delay things less... haiz.. try the kinder way see how.. sighhhh

Our local colleague died suddenly in a road traffic accident yesterday when it was raining..

I feel very sad..

He was also Xiaofang's husband. And we know their 2 boys too.. He is a good brother.

I feel very sad for Xiaofang.

list of things i want for my house

1) L shape sofa
2) metal bar to do pull up on
3) light coloured tiles

wa school is starting soon.. will it be pandemonium with the 2 new staff??!! gosh.. stress.. but not too bad la.. ordered the chinese " developing the leader within you" today.. hope that it will be helpful to Yumei..

Chunyan is in Lijiang.. hope she enjoys her time there and that it will be productive..

the days fly by so fast.. thought of visiting SYL today but she no reply my sms.. wonder if she is in Dali or Kunming or just too busy.. mayb should call her next time..

wonder what the next step is.. sometimes with people coming in and out, and leaving.. i do feel a bit like no energy to get to know new people.. mayb after a while more..

but thank Him for CC and HM, they do seem like earnest girls.. and Yumei seems q committed to getting to know them, even making plans to visit HM's village during mooncake festival.. waa i dont have such commitment yet..

Wanping where are u? miss u! :)

Thought of Kunliang today on the bus out of nowhere.. I miss you brother..

gng for dinner w Isaac and Doris soon :) mayb eat at the 1st lao di fang today.. hmm san xian tang mayb..